MichMoms Blog

Category: Relationships

Despite illness, grandmother offers special gift on special day

There she sat, tears welling in her eyes and a big smile on her face. I looked at her, thankful she could be part of my daughter's special day.

My mother, Aline's grandmother, was diagnosed with acute leukemia almost three months ago. The initial prognosis was grim, to say the least. Amazingly, at 76 years old, she has beaten the odds, survived two rounds of chemotherapy and felt strong enough to attend her only grandchild's christening Sunday.

My mother and I share a special bond; it's a relationship that I hope my daughter and I will have as well. She raised me on her own. As a single mother, she survived many obstacles, yet never once lost sight of her ultimate goal: giving me the future and life she felt I deserved.

Her strength and determination carried her through this painful phase of her life and, even during the most trying times of her cancer treatment, she wanted to make sure I was taking care of myself and her granddaughter's wardrobe was well stocked.

My mother purchased Aline's christening gown while she was in the hospital. She had me take my laptop there so she could shop for dresses online. When she saw the one she liked, she ordered me to get it right away. She went over the christening menu with me and made sure there would be plenty of food for everyone.

Despite being weak, my mother asked to go shopping for a hat to cover her now bald head and have her nails done so she could look presentable Sunday. And she did. Despite sporting a PICC line for her medication on her left arm, and a black wool hat on her head, she was still the same person I've loved and respected all my life.

Thursday, she goes back to the hospital for a third round of chemotherapy. She knows the drill by now and is aware the two weeks that will follow will be challenging. Yet the only question she asked her doctor last week was, "When all this is done, will I able to baby-sit my granddaughter again?"

As I looked at my mom Sunday, that was my wish as well. I want my daughter to learn from and be around this powerful force who has been my guiding angel throughout my life.

Category: Relationships

Parents need couple time - but how?

My kids are gone again this week, hanging out with their grandparents. Woo hoo!, party time for Mom and Dad, right? No, not really. Sure, not having to scramble get the boy wonders out the door in the morning for camp or school makes life a little easier. And not having to really plan dinner, too (thanks, hubby, for not being fussy!) or nag them to get to bed lessens the stress.

But it's really only a few "free" evenings and they seem to fill up fast. So I'm thinking today about all the little projects and errands we should really get done before Friday and then - hey! how about us? - we need to make time for a movie, dinner with friends, a Tigers game, an outdoor concert, something!

Coincidentally, a few hours later I talked to a man who is pitching an idea for stuff for parents to do, together, without kids, among other things. Family togetherness is great, he says and I agree, but you have to be healthy in your marriage, too. I totally agree and vow to work harder at it. So I call my husband and ask him out on a date.

How do you make time for each other?

Category: Relationships

Jon & Kate's divorce hits home

So, it's finally out there, the big elephant in the room, Jon and Kate of the "Jon & Kate Plus Eight" show are divorcing. My niece and I have enjoyed watching this show since she came to live with me. Together, we watched these adorable little children with their huge, brown eyes grow up before us. My niece is a huge fan; she is able to tell each of the sextuplets apart, she knows all their names and can tell you interesting facts on all of them.

Most recently, she went to see Kate speak and was able to meet her briefly. She admired Kate and was impressed by her thoughtful parenting skills and her ability to manage the lives of eight children. So, naturally, when Jon and Kate announced they were divorcing, she was outwardly upset.

Suddenly, after what used to be our feel-good show, I was now consoling my niece and letting her know that Kate, Jon and the kids would be OK. But would they? Clearly, I can help to explain her parents' divorce, but, how do you explain someone else's divorce? Not, so easy.

Love or hate Jon and Kate, this was a family friendly show that was fun to watch without worrying about inappropriate language or behavior. It was our feel-good show that made us laugh out loud from our bellies. It was a show that symbolized the importance of being partners in a marriage and in raising children. For a 12-year-old girl, who is a product of divorce, this last show hit a little too close to home.